Chuju-fer

Future Worries

March 6, 2025 5:39pm

As of late, I've become increasingly concerned with my future. Did you know, my biggest fear is ending up jobless? I somehow believed that I'm so unskilled that even McDonald's would turn me down.

But I've been looking more into my career choice of a special effects artist/animator and, well, artists in general will always have some difficulty, I think. It's not like they stick to one project and studio forever. To be an artist means you're always moving, always working with different people, always starting anew. I wonder how I'll adapt to that.

New Year

January 1, 2025 2:15am

It is 2025 today, and 2024 is a thing of the past now, but it is certainly not forgettable. I spent another lovely year with my best friend Tony and made a new sweet friend named Miku.

I think that because today is also my birthday, it was a little too hectic and I wasn't able to give one thing my sole attention. I also felt much more... open? My feelings were clear on my face and I wanted to make sure my friends knew how much they mean to me, so I didn't stop talking about them to my sisters. I even dedicated two of my twelve grapes to my two dear friends because I want them to have a good year. And you, whoever is reading this, have a good year, too. Know that Fer wishes you luck and prosperity, and that you find what you're looking for this new year.

Belief

December 24, 2024 12:51pm

My younger brother has stopped believing in Santa Claus today. While in my room, I overheard a conversation betweem him and my mom about it, to which my mom said, "If you stop believing, Santa won't give you anything." And then my brother took down his letter from the tree. I assume that he noticed that none of us other siblings had any letters up, so he came to the conclusion that parents are the ones delivering children's gifts.

After that, my mom had me walk the dog and I noticed some packages outside, so I took them in. From the size of the box, I assumed it must be the drawing tablet I asked my mom for, and I was right! When I took the box inside, my mom told me about how my brother didn't believe in Santa anymore, and when I walked back to my room, I saw him sprawled on the couch with a defeated look. He's only 11 years old and has already stopped believing in what children still look forward to on the biggest holiday. Hm.

Surprise

December 22, 2024 04:45pm

I asked Miku what his favorite character is because I want to make him a surprise drawing as a Christmas gift. Before, after I told him I'd wish him happy holidays when the day came, he replied with something along the lines of not being able to enjoy them because of the event he has to attend for a month. In my head, I thought, 'I should make something nice for him to spark that jolly spirit', so I'll start working on his piece today! I'm pretty excited and motivated!! I also appreciate that he's still messaging me despite being busy. Anyway, Fer out!

One whole month

December 20, 2024 08:35pm

Today marks one week that I have been friends with Miku. Do you think it's obsessive that I'm keeping track? Hehe, no, of course not. Little ol' me just isn't used to friendship. But anyway, he told me he'll be away for an exam program event until January 22nd-- a whole month! He said he'll miss me, and that tugged on my poor heart!

He also asked me to take care of his Genshin account, and, being the good friend I am, I agreed. So, he wants Mavuika but has seven pity and zero wishes... I can't fail him! I'll grind and grind until I have nothing to do, just for my friend to be happy because I did a good thing.

Miku

December 16, 2024 07:09pm

I love my friend so much. It's only day three of being friends with Miku and he's told me that out of his three friends, I'm the one who replies to him most and who he's most comfortable talking freely with. That made me so happy.

Even though I was having classes while we texted, I made time between my work to chat because our time zones allow us only so much time. He told me about his dream, a drawing he's working on, a choso-inspired hairstyle he did, a scary adventure he experienced in 2022, and a bit about his other friend. Around 1pm, when I was settling into my last class of the day, he made a little joke about giving me some of his height in response to hearing my own shorter one. It made me smile, and after my class ended, I wished him a good night because it was already nearly 1am for him. He has resparked something in me that has me smiling in class, thinking back at out conversations, and I'm truly grateful to have met him.

New friend

December 14, 2024 09:56pm

I am so happy, I made a new friend last night. I was on Genshin and on a call with my best friend Tony when I got a join request from a player named 'miku'. I accepted and asked if they needed anything. They said they needed cor lapis but didn't know the locations, and couldn't use the interactive map because they were on mobile. As a joke, I said, "if you say please I may help" and they ended up doing so. As I helped them collect materials, we talked a bit (they were super polite but texted very... monotonously?) and ended up on the topic of art. He said he draws and wanted to show me his work so I could rate them, and I agreed. I told him my Instagram username and was a little surprised to see that he had such a bare private account. When he sent me his drawings, I compliment him of how talented he is because the art was so good!! After asking me to be his friend, and after I said yes (of course!!), he told me to remember the date that we became friends.

Of course, I will remember December 13th, 2024 as the day that I became friends with you, Miku. I haven't felt this connection of new friendship in so long, nor the question, "do you want to be my friend?". I want to make an effort so that this friendship doesn't wither away with time forgotten, but instead flourishes.